Honoring the Dead
Halloween. Originating in a pagan “Festival of the Dead,” this spooky holiday comes at a time when many parts of the world are celebrating summer’s end. As the “lighter half” of the year gives way to the “darker half,” people all over the world can be found celebrating and remembering their departed friends, family and ancestors with favorite foods and beverages, photos, memorabilia, stories and lots of laughter.
The most well-known of these celebrations is perhaps the Mexican “Dia de los Muertos” (“Day of the Dead”), which takes place on November 1st and 2nd, (the Catholic holidays, All Saints Day and All Souls’ Day, respectively). Family and friends gather to pray for, celebrate and honor loved ones who have died by visiting their graves and/or building private altars with offerings of sugar skulls, marigolds and all their favorite things.
Scholars have traced the origins of this celebration back thousands of years to indigenous rites including an Aztec festival dedicated to the goddess, Mictecacihuatl, Queen of the Underworld. Similar holidays are celebrated throughout many countries in North, Central and South America, as well as in Europe, Asia and Africa.
Trick or Treat
There is a belief that the border between this world and the next is thinner during this time of year, so it is easier for the souls of the dead—both loved ones and “harmful spirits”—to visit the living. While friends and family were invited into the home for the party, costumes and masks of frightening spirits were worn to ward off and trick the mischievous ones into believing you were “one of them.”
Day of the Dead. Photo: "Catrinas 2" by Tomascastelazo
Facing Shadows
While religious, cultural and societal beliefs have evolved in many ways, this tradition has remained consistent over the years. It is perhaps the one time of year when children and adults can come together to learn about, celebrate and honor the mystery of death in life. The occasion gives us permission to consciously and collectively let the shadow of all that is still unknown into our lives. As we playfully remember and celebrate the dead–allowing them to walk among us again for one night–we have an opportunity to face a little bit of our own immortality.
Ghost in the Stairwell (Public Domain)
My Ghost Stories
Since I was a child, I’ve encountered death more frequently than most, and in some pretty profound and interesting ways. So when I began to do space clearing several years ago, it came as no surprise for me to encounter ghosts from time to time. Occasionally spirits can become confused and, in the thick of unresolved emotional attachments, their consciousness may remain here even long after their passing. In each of my experiences, I have found that the consciousness of a person after death is, in most ways, the same as it was in life. They may have a different perspective on some things, but who they are—and their basic world view—remains the same.
I have found them here on the physical plane for one of two reasons:
- Not long after someone dies, they may visit those they love to say goodbye. They are moving on, but want to let us know they haven’t ceased to exist. It’s not uncommon for the central message to be one of love (and sometimes apologies or forgiveness) for those they leave behind.
- In other cases—particularly when a death has been sudden and violent—the spirit of the dead person may not fully understand what has happened to them. It is pretty common to find that, at first, they don’t realize they’ve passed on. This can be confusing and even frustrating as they suddenly find themselves unable to affect things around them or to communicate with their friends and family. Many times, I have found that the ghostly activity in a home is just a spirit trying to get someone’s attention so they can get their questions answered or ask for help.
Two friends have asked me over the past week what clearing a ghost was like for me. In almost every case, it has been an indescribably beautiful experiences of connection with another person. Through the strong, conscious presence of an open, compassionate heart, the person’s confusion, and the “baggage” of their past, lifts and dissolves. As long as they are ready, this happens quickly. Then, the spirit in front of me becomes more beautiful than anything I’ve ever seen with my physical eyes. As they ascend and move out of sight, I feel the most overwhelming joy and gratitude from them, and their tears literally stream down my face. It is astonishing to me every time to realize such a profound and intimate experience with a complete stranger.
So… Happy Halloween, my friends. Enjoy your time with the dead this night. Then…get busy with the living. Put your arms around them while you can. Let them know you love and accept them as they are. Life’s too short. The moment we have together is happening right now.
What do you think? Please share your ghost stories and ways of remembering the dead by commenting (below)!
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